Saturday, November 6, 2010

Friday, November 5, 2010

I knew a man once; the only man I've ever really known in a cosmic sense. And though we spoke to each other frequently in lies, what we experienced was truth, love. And it occurred to me recently that there was nothing really special about him, or perhaps what was most special about him was just that we allowed ourselves to be free with each other. And, my god, all I want is to just be free. When you give it all up, the pretense, the self-preservation, what you stand to gain is everything. People are killing me with their hang-ups and their negativity lately. Surely, I am not the only person that feels this way. I want out. I want somebody to surprise me. The predictability, the cowardice, the disingenuousness has gotten old.

feather.

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Thursday, November 4, 2010

brass.

I had an exceptionally lovely first date last night. My new policy is to reserve judgment until date four, but yeah, it was good. So so good.

And then, during the train ride home, there was a young boy that turned twenty-two yesterday that tried so very hard to take me home with him. I let him sit real close to me and smile at me while I explained to him that I'm just a little bit too much woman for him. But for a moment there, it made me remember how much fun I had that summer when I was 21 and A was 18. My goodness, we had so much fun. And last night, when I turned down that beautiful young boy, I felt like such a grown-up, and I think I liked it.

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the most beautiful woman ever:
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in time of daffodils(who know
the goal of living is to grow)
forgetting why,remember how

in time of lilacs who proclaim
the aim of waking is to dream,
remember so(forgetting seem)

in time of roses(who amaze
our now and here with paradise)
forgetting if,remember yes

in time of all sweet things beyond
whatever mind may comprehend,
remember seek(forgetting find)

and in a mystery to be
(when time from time shall set us free)
forgetting me,remember me

e. e. cummings

Wednesday, November 3, 2010